The Language of Love

[Teddy Dupont]

This is not a typical "Ask the Doctor" post but I think it is an issue we need to discuss and it is nearly as interesting as bridge height and tuner design. The issue being.........what words do we like and what words do we dislike? Since I have a positive, optimistic and almost bubbly disposition, I think I want to focus primarily on words I like.

Those of you who read my fascinating and informative posts will probably already realise I am rather partial to the word Flatulence. Burping, belching and farting are truly ghastly words but flatulence has an almost majestic ring to it. It is the sort of word where you could sidle up to an attractive young lady, whisper in her ear "I have flatulence" and she would ravish you on the spot. (Let me know if it works alright Catty). Which conveniently brings me to another favourite of mine - Ravish. That word is so gratuitously debauched that the mere sound of it sends shivers down your spine. In a similar vein is a word I used in a recent post Salacious. It is so unquestionably wanton that one cannot help but dribble as it slithers like a snake off your tongue.

Juxtaposition. Quite fabulous! Any word that can combine a "j" and an "x" is clearly top flight but the splendour of Bombastic is hard to beat. Another gem - Cornucopia. So exhilarating, light and airy that everytime I hear it, I just want to rip off my surgical support and run freely through fields of wheat, barley and rape seed oil.

And finally, a word that describes my own situation so well Priapic - a strutting Greek god of a word.

Words I don't like? Well there are almost as many of those as there are people I don't like - tens of thousands. You all know my feelings about Moist. Absolutely disgusting; a word clearly penned by the Devil himself. Recently, I have found I am becoming increasingly revolted by Tartlet. It has such a mincing syntax that one cannot help but become slightly repulsed and affronted by its use. Only last week the somewhat plump, aged female proprietor of a tea room asked whether I would like to try her warm cherry tartlets in a thick blackcurrant colis and I had to quickly turn away to avoid wretching.

So many words. So little time.

[Thrip]

Throughout my life I have had a love/hate relationship with the word pamphlet

[Caballero]

Mine has to be MINGE.
Most likely because, being a child of the 70's, it brings back memories of classic retro 70's bush pictures you saw in Mayfair when you were about 11 years old. Or maybe dreams of your best mates Mum, wondering if she had a 'full' bush. I'm not a big fan of the 'Brasilian' wax or shaved variety. But at the same time I'm not fond of birds with hairy legs, just a nice full Minge.
Besides, it's a gypsy word in origin and totally in keeping with this forum.

[Thrip]

Besides, it's a gypsy word in origin and totally in keeping with this forum.

Hmmm interesting. Do you actually know that or are you jumping to conclusions because of what Matelo says in the "La Minch" clip??

[Caballero]

Goddammit Thrip! you're always a smart ass.
When I was a kid growing up just outside of Brighton, everyone used the 'minge' word, no-one used the c*** word. It came from the shitloads of Romanies that integrated with society in England from way back. It's true, I cross-referenced it with a Romany Family I knew way back. It's a lovely word

MINGE

[GitanePlayer]

Yes, Cabbo is correct - Minge has romany origins and is a word that is wonderfully evocative of the hairy pie. However, some sources take it back further than that.

It is suggested that 'Stone Henge' was actually a representation of the 'vulva' and that the word 'Henge' was used instead of 'Minge' so the Archdruids could get away with going off to 'worship' the 'vulva' - without their wives finding out! - so, really that big stone circle is 'Stone Minge'.

I present two pieces of evidence to support my theory:

1) Diagram comparing vulva with 'Stone Minge'

2) 'Stone Minge' in its original form

Interestingly enough, by coincidence, the diagram contained one of my favourite words - 'Cleft'

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleft_of_venus

... which brought up a rather amusing phrase: "moose knuckle"

[Caballero]

Excellent Mike! See, you lot, Minge is virtually sacred! Lets all bow/chow down to the Great MINGE.
This is all getting a tad vulgar, I already have a terrible rep as it is, can someone go back to Teddys original thread please?










minge

[Zoot]

Mike's post has me raising my own obelisk here, and I consider that to be remarkable piece of research well in need of an arts grant.

Words that have me rubbing myself against the door jam are:
Quintessence
This is a hugely under used term, probably because only 4 people on the planet actually understand what it is as it's a hyperthetical term regarding the form of dark matter.

One that came to light at Samois from the mighty Thrip is:
Frottage.
I've been using this word a lot recently as a feeble excuse to young ladies on tube trains.

Words that I find rather distasteful are few and far between but as a child the words butter and suger in the same sentence has always made me cringe. Also well as the word "foodstuffs".
Perhaps as a reaction to these words as a child I have taken it on myself to destroy them as an adult by consuming them in vast quantities thus explaining my current weight problem. Or perhaps I'm just a fat git like everyone says.

Can you help Doctor?

[Rene]

I currently detest the common abuse of the word "solution".

As in, par example, meal solutions, or transport solutions. It suggests either a watery soup, or a boiled car.

[Thrip]

I currently detest the common abuse of the word "solution".

I absolutely agree, it's completely loathesome.

I saw a van the other day from a company calling themselves "Fluid Transfer Solutions"

know what they sold? hoses!

they should have gone the whole way and gone with "Solution Tranfer Solutions"

[Dennis]

Some years ago a female friend wrote a silly play for the kids of the local youth club. She, completely innocently, named two villains in the play Muff and Minge beacause, "it sounded funny".

One of the slightly less innocent ladies took her to one side to explain and a rapid re-write took place.

I think they should have left it as it was - the kids would have LOVED it...

D.

[GitanePlayer]

I've always been intrigued by the word 'phlegm', and even more so after reading the dictionary definition of it, apart from the 'thick, sticky, stringy mucus secreted by the mucous membrane' definition.

Apparently it also means - 'Calm self-possession; equanimity'.

Anyway, this thread is getting a bit bizarre, perhaps we should go back to discussing zero fret height or the correct bone-density ratio for the nut.

[GitanePlayer]

Frottage.
I've been using this word a lot recently as a feeble excuse to young ladies on tube trains

Apparently you are engaged in 'Frotteurism'.

[Teddy Dupont]

....have me rubbing myself against the door jam....

What a truly appalling thought!!

Perhaps as a reaction to these words as a child I have taken it on myself to destroy them as an adult by consuming them in vast quantities thus explaining my current weight problem. Or perhaps I'm just a fat git like everyone says.

Can you help Doctor?

I have given this matter a lot of thought before replying as I am fully aware of how sensitive to comments about their weight morbidly obese people like yourself can be. I even had a long conversation with my friend Dr Felix Pheilzer who counsels overly rotund individuals who are unable to come to terms with their weight problems. We both decided the best advice I could give you is to eat and drink less you greedy bastard.

I very much hope that helps.

[Jono]

I'm inclined to agree with Dennis Potter's Singing Detective character - the word elbow is not only a great sounding word but it looks good on the page - especially in elegant cursive lines if your penmanship is up to it. Unfortunately I'm told that it has now been taken as the name of some modern popular music combo which makes me less fond of it.

Teddy's choices are pretty good but I'm not so sure about flatulence. I do however think it's a great comedy word and even funnier in adjective form. Trouser is another great comedy word - much funnier in singular form for some reason.