Q: What do you call a Tuba player with a pager?

Exactly what it says on the tin

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Q: What do you call a Tuba player with a pager?

Postby TedGottsegen » Mon Feb 24, 2003 5:22 pm

A: Positive thinking.
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Postby Rene » Tue Feb 25, 2003 2:07 pm

Have you heard Fanfare Ciocarlia, or the Fanfare din Cozmesti ?
No offence,
Rene
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Postby guzzi_uk » Tue Mar 11, 2003 11:06 pm

A tuba player's driving down the motorway at 80 mph and theres a frog driving the other way at 80mph!
Whats the difference between them?
The frog could be on the way to a gig!
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Postby mobiegobie » Thu Jun 19, 2003 10:12 pm

:lol:
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Postby Phydeaux3 » Tue Jul 08, 2003 7:56 pm

Uump Pahh!!!
Alors! Un, deux...
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Postby Jan Primus » Tue Jul 08, 2003 8:53 pm

I love tubas! I think they are cool.
Drummers, and banjo players? Now your'e talking.
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Postby djangology » Fri Jul 11, 2003 9:59 pm

didn't Fred Flinstone play a tuba?
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Postby Thrip » Sat Jul 12, 2003 12:21 pm

What's the definition of a Southern Gentleman?

Someone who knows how to play the banjo, but doesn't.
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Postby justjack » Sun Jul 13, 2003 5:05 am

Thrip,

That is a great friggin' joke-and I like banjo!
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Postby Jan Primus » Mon Jul 14, 2003 3:52 pm

What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)...
onion?
No one cries when you cut up a banjo.

uzzie?
An uzzie only repeats forty times.

chain saw?
A chain saw has a dynamic range. ...and/or...
You can turn a chainsaw off.
The way you hold it

Harley Davidson motorcycle?
You can tune a Harley.

trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline

And so on...
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Postby Plowboy » Wed Jul 23, 2003 6:41 am

Q: What's the best pick-up to use on a banjo?

A: A Ford F-150
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Banjo my Arse!

Postby Nev » Tue Sep 14, 2004 12:51 am

Seriously folks, a few years ago someone called me up and offered me a banjo for a few sovs. Never one to miss a golden opportunity, I snapped up the said 'instrument' (I uses the word cautiously here) and put it in my Shed. It is still there, never been played since. I like to think of it as being , and I quote John DeChastelaine here, put 'beyond use' and 'verifieably decomissioned' I feel I've done my bit............
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Banjo my Arse!

Postby Nev » Tue Sep 14, 2004 12:53 am

Seriously folks, a few years ago someone called me up and offered me a banjo for a few sovs. Never one to miss a golden opportunity, I snapped up the said 'instrument' (I use the word cautiously here) and put it in my Shed. It is still there, never been played since. I like to think of it as being , and I quote John DeChastelaine here, put 'beyond use' and 'verifieably decomissioned' I feel I've done my bit............
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Postby Northern-Neil » Fri Sep 24, 2004 12:29 am

Q: Wot's the best sound a banjo makes?
A: Splash!

Q: What's the difference between a photo of a banjo player and a banjo player?
A: The photo's fully developed!

Q: Whats the difference between a drummer and a banjo player?
A: drummers only dribble out of one side of their mouths!

Q: What d'you do if a banjo player with half a face walks towards you?
A: Stay calm and reload!
...Eh up, Djangologists!
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Jazz jokes

Postby JIHEME » Fri Sep 24, 2004 10:39 pm

Ok, jazz joke. Here we go.

Sax player drives back home at 2am after a gig. Flashing lights, siren behind him. "Oh no" he says, "it's the jazz police". So he pulls over.

Jazz policeman strolls over.

"Evening Sir, back from a gig, are we?".

"yes Officer"

"Been drinking, have we?"

"No Officer"

Jazz policeman produces a chord sheet. "Alright, then, could you blow on these, Sir?"

Boom boom.
Ma parole.
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