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humor

Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 3:42 pm

LOGIC "Nothing is better than eternal happines. A ham sandwich is better than nothing. Therefore, a ham sandwich is better than eternal happines."

If there's no such thing as a stupid question, what is this?
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Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 4:03 pm

Is it normal if your psychiatrist cries after every session?
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Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 4:31 pm

It's not the voices in my head that bother me. It's the voices in YOUR head that bother me!

If I could eat two sugars at once, would that make me ambidextrose?
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Postby djangology » Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:06 pm

its funny how there is 20 minutes between each of your posts... its like a delayed schizophrenia episode LOL
Last edited by djangology on Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:10 pm

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
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Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:10 pm

Coral, when painted brown and attached to the head with common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.
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Postby boral » Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:11 pm

Why does everybody say it's the quiet ones you need to look out for? I'm worried about that very pissed and very loud man in the middle of the street with a chainsaw and a shotgun.
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Postby christerflea » Sat Sep 03, 2005 12:18 am

djangology wrote:its funny how there is 20 minutes between each of your posts... its like a delayed schizophrenia episode LOL



haha
Chris :)

I was born on the same date Django died (not same year). Maybe he's come back as me, but I doubt it as I suck at Gypsy Guitar :)
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Postby boral » Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:18 pm

Good Idea : Take a deep breath before jumping into a pool

Bad Idea: take a deep breath after jumping into a pool.
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Postby boral » Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:19 pm

If Bill Gates had a nickel for every time Windows crashed... oh wait, he does!
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Postby boral » Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:20 pm

"If nothing sticks to Teflon, then how does Teflon stick to the pan?"
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Postby boral » Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:21 pm

If swimming is so good for your figure, then how the hell do you explain whales?
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Postby boral » Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:22 pm

Little Kid's Books We'd Like to See:

'You Were An Accident'
'Strangers Have the Best Candy'
'The Little Sissy Who Snitched'
'Some Kittens Can Fly!'
'The Protocols of the Grandpas of Zion'
'How to Dress Sexy for Grownups'
'Getting More Chocolate on Your Face'
'Where Would You Like to Be Buried?'
'Katy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her'
'The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!'
'All Dogs Go to Hell'
'The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking'
'When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer They Say God Did It'
'Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia'
'What Is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?'
'Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?'
'Bi-Curious George'
'Daddy Drinks Because You Cry'
'Mister Policeman Eats His Service Revolver'
'You Are Different and That's Bad'
'Why God Burned Down Disney Land'
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